My Will
Deep
in the night,
A
nameless bird sings sadly from a tree.
Long
ago, while I was studying
In
a mountain temple, steeped in solitude,
The
hoots of an owl and the gurgle of a flowing stream
Would
sound throughout the night.
Those
lonely times of solitude have changed to longing.
There
was a time when there were countless thoughts boiled over in my mind;
A
time when I was chased by my circumstances
But
did not achieve anything.
Now
with hindsight, I can see it is fortunate
I
did not fulfill ay of my big ideals.
I
was not a great person,
And
I lived ridiculing myself
Disliking,
ignoring and cursing myself;
Telling
myself that I was the one who was wrong.
Perhaps
this is why I did not have much to repent.
I
was not great in any way
So
I was humble and I worked hard.
As
a result, I lived well
Compared
to the days of scarcity in my childhood.
Of
the years that silently passed, during the time
When
I first started teaching Truth in Mount Gaya,
I
again heard the cries of that owl every night;
The
owl that had struck a chord in my lonely heart.
Everyone
who sought me out each came to me
With
fifty thousand thoughts,
As
they shed these fifty thousand agonies,
They
showed the forms of their minds
In
fifty thousand different ways.
Only
then did I realize that man is uglier, dirtier,
And
infinitely more vile than I was.
When
I had scolded myself,
Telling
myself that I was dirty, ugly,
And
the worst person in the world,
It
had been an unknowing repentance.
With
the title of dō-in, I awaken people.
I
cannot describe the joy I felt
When
after many nights meditating together till dawn,
Those
countless people, who had laughed and cried
Within
their fifty thousand agonies, enlightened to the Truth.
I
had also felt happy when I escaped from the grave
And
came out into the world,
But
I had more joy in their enlightenment than I had in my own,
Which
was boundless each time a person’s consciousness
Changed
from falseness to Truth.
It
was the first time in the world
People
were truly becoming enlightened,
And
as the founder,
The
fact that people were actually achieving Truth,
Was
tremendously moving.
People’s
fifty thousand agonies decreased
As
they moved up through the levels,
Inside
the framework of their selves,
Which
is something man grimly holds onto until the end.
Those
whose false selves tried to enlighten to the Truth,
Were
unable to ignore their false selves or progress further
And
ultimately did not achieve Truth.
However
those who were like bears and did not give up,
Those
who were constant and had thankful hearts
Are
still meditating and are close to completion.
Time
flew by silently,
And
since then twelve, thirteen years have passed.
I
started teaching Truth in my mid-forties,
But
now my hair has turned grey
And
my youth and energy have vanished.
I
entering into old age;
I
am becoming a wrinkled grandpa,
With
grey hair and ground-down teeth.
My
body does not move as I will it to, as it did in my youth.
The
world is wide,
But
I am living a human life with only seventy to eighty years,
And
there is so much left to do in the world.
So
regardless of whether it is day or night,
All
my time is dedicated to teaching people Truth.
My
mind is busy, so busy, with the constant thought
That
people all over the world must be awakened;
And
I am waiting and waiting,
For
the day when all people have become complete,
And
all people are able to live.
It
is my hope that before I die,
Truth
will be spread all over the world
And
everyone will be resurrected as Truth.
I
pity people who live and die without meaning or purpose;
It
is heartbreaking.
It
is my will to work hard
So
that even one more person may live.
-Woo Myung-
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